The Chaos that is Christmas

I love Christmas. I love white snow falling outside, a roaring fireplace, creating magical memories with family and friends. All those Kodak moments we see everywhere.

I grew up in South Africa so our Christmases looked very different. Well firstly there is no snow in Christmas, Christmas is right in the middle of our big summer vacations that are filled with sun, sand, swimming and just being a kid outside. Pretty much the opposite of what a Christmas looks like in my Hallmark fantasy. Growing up I used to wish we could have a Christmas like in the movies. And now I can!

And let us be honest it is not all it cracks up to be. Don't get me wrong, I still love Christmas and all the fun and amazing things about it but somehow all the hard work, the energy, the effort, the fighting, the driving, the late nights and the pure exhaustion never feature in any of my fantasies (or the movies) growing up.

Having three little ones that still believe in the magic of Santa as well as his wonderful (hateful) Elf of the Shelf becomes a second or is that third or maybe tenth full time job. I am being pulled into ten directions at once and I am not sure which ball to catch next.

Last night I woke up at 1:48 in a blind panic - we forgot to move the elf. Me and Elfie have a serious love hate relationship. My kids jump out of bed every morning to see where he is today and I love seeing the smiles and joy on their faces once they find it. But to tell the truth by December 5, I had forgotten to move him twice! And he only arrived on the 1st. Facepalm! Elfie is a lot of work and takes planning and thought! None of which I really have the capacity to supply.

Elfie is just one thing on my even longer to do list. Add on to that, planning dinners with friends (I over do this as I never want someone to feel left out and we are so blessed with amazing people in our lives), getting to all the parades the tree lightings, Christmas shows, bazaars, performances, planning actual Christmas eve and Christmas day, shopping for gifts (with a postal service strike just to make it extra interesting) decorating the house for Christmas, maybe thinking of a potential short trip away or alternatively activities to keep the littles busy while on break and I am exhausted!

Where do I find time and/or energy for the playing in the snow, baking Christmas cookies together, strolling through a Christmas market hand in hand or building a snowman and naming him Frosty! What about board games, carolling, hot chocolate, Home alone marathon, Christmas pictures.... None of which sound particularly appealing to the rest of my family off the bat.

Breathe! And stop is what I constantly have to tell myself now even more so than during the rest of the year. We do not have to do everything. If we don't get amazing Christmas photos in matching pajamas it does not mean Christmas is ruined or and this is the true fear - that I failed.

This year has taught me a lot, and to be kind to myself is probably the biggest lesson of all. We can share the load. Ask someone else to plan a dinner, ask your hubby, partner or friend to do elfie. This past week, we did McDonalds 3 times and we lived. All three kids may have gotten an extra vitamine the next day but nothing happened.

I realized that Christmas = Chaos (or maybe just our lives = chaos) and that is okay. There are dishes in the sink, the floor has not been mopped in quite a while, the couch may have a stain from last weeks milk incident (we can cover that with a throw blanket). For the month of December I stock up on frozen meals, house chores take a back seat and we do what we can. If people come to visit and something is not to their liking, they are welcome to grab a broom or a cloth or alternatively leave.

My photos may not match those on Instagram or look like they come from a Hallmark movie, but that is okay. We make our own memories. Baking cookies has proven to not really be our thing ( a three year old cannot crack eggs and I cannot deal with the fighting about who gets to do what) but fondue seems to work like a charm. Who knew... Sometimes I still have a mini anxiety attack about the ever long to do list but a gentle reminder that chaos is okay! We do what we can and what works for us and that is perfect for us! The dirty floors, dishes in the sink, take away containers on the counter and piles of laundry that needs a home seems to magically fade away and all I see are smiles and sparkling eyes, joy and cuddles.

Christmas is a magical time. The magic comes at a bit of a price aka Chaos but honestly I would not have it any other way.